In 2014, I sat alone in a royal horse-drawn carriage bound for the Palace in the city of peace and justice. Close to the center, the city was busy and tourists took their phones out and waved. We must have been quite a pretty sight – two horse drawn carriages, one gold, the other black, with a police escort at the front and the back. It was great meeting the King in a private audience. He’s really tall.

It’s 2017, and for the past two years, I’ve been either changing diapers, managing feeds and eventually food, entertaining an active toddler, wiping snot, vomit, and poo in no particular order, or trying to get some paid work done.

Packaged in with my 3.5kg newborn bundle was an identity crisis of epic proportions.

Finding a balance between pursuing a career and wanting to be there to witness every second of your child’s life is tough. But balance means less of one and more of the other. What happens when you find yourself wanting both?